Sunday, November 29, 2009



I was talking with a friend today and I started thinking about when I was a young girl around the age of 8.  I used to love going to visit my aunt and uncle that lived in Litchfield, MI during December. My aunt alwasy had campbells's chicken noodle soup to eat and that was my favorite way back then.  They lived in a second floor apartment across the street from the park, that was in the center of town. I was visiting on a cloudy, cold december day. The snow was was falling softley to the ground all day. I looked out the living room window to watch the snow as it gentley fell from the dark night sky. The park across the street was all lit up from the street lights and all the christmas decorations. Right directley across from the apartment window was the display of the baby Jesus and the manger. Throuhg the snow and lights it looked so real that I kept looking to see if any of he figures were going to move. I just knew that baby Jesus must be cold. My aunt noticed me looking at the scene in the park and turned off all the lights and tv in the apartment so I could hear the christmas music that they played non stop in the park. My heart was filled with love and anticipation of christmas. To a young girl of eight it was such a magical night and sight to behold. One that will forever be etched in my mind.

Saturday, November 28, 2009


Thank you Jesus I made it through another Thanksgiving.... Hope everyone had a great time and ate lots and lots..... Now we just have to wait for Christmas so we can eat more and more... it's just a visous cycle we live in... but.... it sure tastes good.

What a beautiful day this is, the sun is shining and we are going to the movies in a few min. to see The Blind Side and then maybe stop for a bite to eat and then on to the hospital to visit my cousin that is still waiting for the doc to decide if he is putting a pacemaker in or not.  I just pray they can fix it with thyroid meds.

God gave me a wonderful gift last night.  I was on facebook trying to figure it all out when a dear friend of mine that lives here in Saginaw got on and started talking to me. Have not seen or talked to her in a couple of years.  She came right over and we talked for hours just catching up on life. I thank God for that. Praise the Lord for his loving kindness and knowing what we need and when we need it.

Have a godly day

Wednesday, November 25, 2009


I was thinking tonight of all the past Thanksgivings in my life...  so many people have come and gone in my life, some just moving on and others going to be with God.  I wonder when we get to Heaven if we will still have Thanksgiving dinner... sure hope so.

I am thinking of my friend Jodie that lost her husband this year to cancer.  He was only 42. She is spending her first Thanksgiving without her husband this year and is having a hard time with all the emotions. God keep her in your arms....

My friend Marsha lost her husband of 40 some years last year and is in Flordia by herself this Thanksgiving.  God keep her in your arms.

My heart goes out to Charlie that is on life support in Bay Medical this Thanksgiving and his family is going to have to make the decision to take him off the life support and let him go with God....  God keep him in your arms.....

All of us have people in our lives that are in the same positions at this time of year so I ask that God keep all of your friends and family in his arms also.

Thank God for all the Thanksgivings that we do have with our loved ones, what a blessing.

Love and Light


My act of kindness yesterday was buying my sister a fake christmas tree and taking it to her.  She forgot and left her tree in the pole barn when she moved from the other house.

We went to see my cousin Phyllis yesterday because she is over here in the Midland Hospital.  They are still trying to make the decision to put a pacemaker in her, she is only 51 but has a lot of medical conditions. 

From there we went to Harrison to take Rita her tree and from there we took her husband Barry to Bay City so he could be with his sister and her family.  His brother in law Charlie, who is only 50 years old,  went in the hospital last week with the H1N1 virus and they had to put him on life support. The problem with Charlie is that he weighs over 500 pounds and never took care of himself at all.  The doctor has told them they are giving him 48 to 72 hours to show some improvement and then they will have to make the decision to take him off life support.

I am praying for all of them and thanking God for all that is well in my life this year......

I will be gone to Lansing until Sat. so you won't hear from me until then so I wishing all of you a Blessed holiday with your families....  Praise to the Lord .....

Monday, November 23, 2009


Yesterday before we went up to Harrison I was watching the tv show Amazing Facts.  Doug was speaking about God telling his people they were to work six days and rest on the seventh day, the Sabbath....  I like the facts he points out in the bible, they really make you think.  You can check him out at  he even has a online bible study for free.  It does amaze me that the churches don't follow the commandment of resting on the seventh day.

This is the front of the house.

This is the north side of the house.

It is in good condition on the inside but still needs some things done to it.  If it is meant to be then God  will make it happen and give me what and who I need to do his work.

My act of Kindness yesterday was sharing the trip to see the house with my family and friends.

My cousin Phyllis is in the hospital, they are not sure if she needs a pacemaker or not, please put her on your prayer list.

Love and Light

Sunday, November 22, 2009


God Bless everyone today....

My act of kindness yesterday was lending a ear to my cousin who's husband is passing over to be with the Lord from ALS.....  she is dealing with all kinds of Insurance problems. She just retired fromt he State to be able to care for her husband so she has good Insurance and it is still a night mare for her. Please say a prayer for both of them....  Cindy and Barry.... 

This is such a calming fall picture that I wanted to share with everyone....  I wonder what she is thinking...  I think she is thanking God for such the  beauitful fall with all the warm weather we had this year. 

I have been up since 4:30 this morning because I am excited about going to Harrison today to look at the house again.  The Lord is leading me in that direction and I know he will provide what ever is needed to serve him and help his people.  I know he has a higher calling for me in the second half of my life.  Most of you know me and know that has not been the way my life has been.  Once God started calling me to be in service, so many things are changing and it is all through the seeds he is planting.......  what a wonderful feeling.  I pray that all of you are a part of this mission for the Lord.  Aleta, I know you are reading this, God just put this in my heart to ask you....  when the chapal opens he wants you to sing the blessing song for his people.....  will you do it?

Love and Light

Friday, November 20, 2009

The House of Hope

Ok, so I never made it out of the house yesterday to get my cards, however I will do it today.  Even thou I did'nt make it out of the house yesterday I was able to do my act of kindness and share God.

A friend of mine was having problems with one of the many gov. agency so we spent time on the phone getting things taken care of.  Thank God I have a cousin that could tell us what we needed to do....  and it was all taken care of and she felt much better...  Thank God.

While she was here we were able to talk about the Church and God.  It started out by me asking her if she thought her teenage daughter would like to go to the pep group at Chuch with me on wen. nights....  she would be a great asset to the group.... but..  she has a class she has to take on wen. nights so she can graduate in the spring...  so...  i will she if she wants to go to Church with me one Sunday. 

I found out that my son Scott and his fiance talk about the bible a lot. My children were not raised in the Church but we always talked about God and his best friend was in a Church family so Scott did attend with his friend and went to bible camp in the summer.  I am going to ask him and his family to go to Church with me on Christmas, have to start somewhere.

Alvin and I will not be in Church on Sunday because we are going to Harrison to meet with the realtor to look at the house again and Scott and Tracy are going with us to see it.  They know I am buying it to turn it into The House Of Hope and The Chapel Of Hope.  I want them to be a part of it because once I am gone I would like them to carry it on, they are very interested. I sure will be able to use my sons help getting things put together. It's all part of God's plan and everything is falling into place.  The House Of Hope will be just that, a place that people can come any time, 24/7, when they feel they have no hope and need help getting back on track. Life does not run just 9 to 5 or Sunday mornings so God has put it in my heart to have a place that is always open for people to come to and feel safe.  I know there has been times in my life that I needed such a place and had no where to turn, so I know others need the same thing.  The door at The House of Hope will always be open.

I have a lot of family in Harrison that I know for sure will be there to help me with what ever I need which is such a great blessing.  It is the town I came from and the town I want to give back to. 

Love and Light

Thursday, November 19, 2009


As Thanksgiving is fast approaching it is time to start thinking about the people and things we are thankful for and start counting our blessing.

I have made the decision today that the way I am going to share the holiday with my friends and family is that I am going to the store today and buy Thinking Of You cards.  I am going to write notes in each one telling them why I am thankful for them......  I guess that must be a act of kindness for today.  So many times we are thankful for things that people do for us and we tell everyone else about it, but we never take the time to tell the person that we are thankful for.

I remember one time my step mother telling me how proud my dad was of me and the way I had turned out and that he told everyone how proud he was.....  I looked at her and said, thats nice, but it would mean more if he told me.....  she went home and told him what I said and he made a special trip from Traverse City just to tell me he was proud of me.  He told me that him nor my mother could take the credit for the way I turned out because they had nothing to do with it..... it had to be something in me that wanted to be better.  That really was not totaly ture because they both taught me all the ways I never wanted to be. I my heart I know they both did the best they knew how to do coming from what and where they came from and I am greateful for both of them.....

My act of kindness yesterday was helping my sons girlfriend get information she needs to help her daughter.

Acts of kindness can be anything, but I am finding out that by doing this I am thinking about them all the time,which I think will make me a better person.

I love all of you and bless each and everyone of you.
Love and Light

Wednesday, November 18, 2009


Good Morning,

I got the challange idea from Lysa....

I am going plant a seed of kindness every day for the next 365 days and put what I do on here everyday.  An act of kindness can be any thing from saying hi to someone in the store to giving to your family.  My challenge to you is to do the same thing and share with us in the commet box what you have done..... 

God works in mysterious ways and I think through us becoming conscious of the things we do he can change us and heal us. 

Remember to say a prayer for Linda Peake....

God bless each of you

Love and Light

Tuesday, November 17, 2009


Today is a day of praise and thanks giving..

Alvin and I talked with the doctor yesterday and he said Alvin's cancer is only in the bladder, it has not travled anywhere else.  By taking the bladder out and giving him a drain tube and bag he should live a long life.  The doctor is still going to have a ct scan done on Alvin, where they put dye in him and then check to see how it goes back to the bladder, just to make sure the cancer is no where else. He will not even have to have chemo or radiation. What a blessing. Praise the Lord.  He should be going in Sparrow Hospital in Lansing this next week to have the surgery and will have a 7 to 10 day stay and then a 4 to 6 recovery time.  He just feels so blessed.

Alvin and I both want to thank each and everyone of you for your prayers and best wishes.

Also, I received  a request for prayers for Linda Peake who is losing her fight with cancer, she only has 3 to 6 weeks to live..... she is a lady from our church.  

Dear God, I don't know Linda personally but she is your child and you do, that's all that matters. Lord you are the great healer and creator of all miracles in this world and only you can fix Linda's cancer. Hear our prayers, feel our love, and give her grace and healing. You only have 3 weeks Lord, but I know you only need 3 seconds.....  Work your miracle and keep her here for a little longer.  Thank you for listening...  your loving servant, Betty.  AMEN

Sunday, November 15, 2009


I have thought long and hard in the past few days about cancer since Alvin is now on that journey in life.  I truly believe that it is just another word for the devil.  I guess if he can not get your soul and spirit he will go after your body. Instead of blaming the devil we some how twist it around and blame God....  It's not God's fault, he does not give it to us, I know this for sure because he is a loving God...  I do believe that even though it is the work of he devil if our faith in God is strong enough and we believe without a doubt that God can heal us...... then he can....  I can pray all I want for Alvin, but Alvin is the one that has to talk with God about it.  I do know that Alvin is a man that accepts things a day at a time and believes that people do the things they do because they are human.  He is a man that has faced many things in life that none of us could even imagine, and is still so postive about life and people and is greateful just for waking up in the morning....  and I believe he will beat the cancer once he knows that he is fighting the devil.  I will always pray for him every day on this journey he is on and be by his side.

Love and Light


Friday, November 13, 2009


Good Morning,

Sorry I have not written.  I have been out of town and forgot to post that info before I left.  I was in Lansing because Alvin had to go into the hospital and have a tumor removed from his bladder.  After the surgery the doctor came and talked to me and let me know that it is cancer, he removed it, put in a cath. until Alivn sees him on monday.  At that time he will talked with Alvin about removing his bladder or other options....  Alvin is doing real good with all of it, I think because he has not spoke with the doc. himself yet.  Monday will change the course of his life...  I just ask that all of you pray for him.... God is the only one that can create a miracle.

Now, on a lighter note....  As I was setting here praying this morning God fianlly told me what my mission is and now I am just waiting to hear where it is supposed to be.  I think it will change the way all Churches handles their ministries.  I can not reveal what it is yet, but it will be a huge undertaking and I will need a lot of help.... it will take all of us..... and  I think it will be something that you as women will want to be a part of from the ground floor...  If God puts it in your heart I know you will be a part of it. This will fill such a huge need in every community...  I will let you know what it is when God puts it in my heart to share it... it is just the beginning for all of us.

Monday, November 9, 2009


Good Morning,

I have been watching the Joyce Meyer show on tv this morning and put her link on below my message for you to check out.  She has bought a huge old hospital and is gutting it and turning into a place for women to go to that has been part of the sex trafficing in the united states.  This is something as a women I could not even imagine happening to me as a child.....

I sometimes sit and ask God....  how could you allow a small child that can not protect themself against the devil be hurt in this way or any other way....  where are you, where are your angel's... 

I will be praying on this today.

Love and Light

Love « The Love Revolution

Love « The Love Revolution

Sunday, November 8, 2009


As I sat in Church this morning listening to the Pastor talking about the changes that were coming to the little Church of God here in Sagianw,  it was as if the entire Church filled with God's Angel's...  I could feel the presents of the heavenly father and his light of love.  We here in the human flesh are usually not accepting of changes because we fear the unknown.  The spiritual movement that is present in the world today with all the Mega Churches that are coming out of the ashes are ushering in a change like we have never known before.  Those Mega Churches are filled with young and old, lot's of singing and dancing and most of all.....  Praise for the Lord! Our young today want to jump and shout.....  and we need to let them.  Our young is what keeps us going in every area of this human life.  I just pray that they have learned to let the past go and not hold them back because we need them to move us forward.  Just because they do not look the way we think they should or act the way we think they should does not mean they are not going to lead us into the future....  believe it or not they are very spirtual beings and just as full of God's DNA as we older ones are.... everything is God's plan no matter what we want to think and the youth are doing just fine.  The Bible tells us that they we will go against us, and they are.... that is all part of God's plan also. At this point I guess it is just important that each one of us makes sure we have our hearts straight with God.  I know I want to go in the Rapture....  I don't want to stick around for the rest.

This is just my way of thinking and how I feel about things......  none of us are perfect and we are all doing the best we know how to do...... one minute at a time, one day at a time, one life at a time.  God has give each and eveyone of us a live time to accept him as our Lord and Savior, either we are with him, or we're not, but no one makes that decision for us but US. God knows no matter what we aquire here on earth, we don't get to take a U-Haul to heaven with us.  In our dieing moments (if we are lucky to have those moments) we are not thinking about the material things we are leaving..... we are things about the ones we love and will miss.....  so why not think that way every day?

Love and Light

Saturday, November 7, 2009


Hi Everyone,

I have to share this with you tonight.

I got a phone call from my cousin Rose in Texas telling me that her daughter in laws mom had called them to tell them about a little 5 year old boy that is dieing of cancer.  His wish is to recieve as many chritmas cards as he can before he dies.  They say he may have until Christmas, but it could be any day.  Here is his address and a chance for you to fill a childs simple wish.  Remember, my cousin Rose is the one that lost her grandson to cancer so it is all close to her heart.

Noah Biorkman
1141 Fountain View Cr.
South Lyon, MI 48178

I am sending mine out in the morning....

I am grateful that God is asking us to be a part of his wish and giving us a chance to pray for him and his family at such a painful time.

Thanks to all of you,
Love and Light


This was my yesterday.....

After I wrote on here yesterday I got around and headed up to Harrison to have lunch with Faith.  Faith started out being the realtor that listed my house for sale in Harrison.  From the first day that I spoke with her there was a connection, like we had known each other forever.  She sold my house and I moved back to Sagainaw but we never lost touch.  While in Harrison we never talked about the closeness we felt, but through emails we started talking and became friends. 

All the way to Harrison yesterday I was praying that God would let me create a Miracle for someone...  Faith and I had a nice lunch and wonderful conversation. There is so much about us that is alike.  I always look forward to spending time with her. 

To me, nothing really earth shaking happed while we were having lunch. By that I mean I did'nt feel any miracles were taking place.  We talked a lot about God, the church in Saginaw, her faith and believes and that she would like to find a church that she felt comfortable going to.  She wants to belong to one that accepts everyone no matter who or what they are in this life.

I stopped and seen my sister while I was in Harrison and dropped off a care package, not much new going on there......   Got to see Jodie and Danny while visiting Rita and Barry.

I drove out on Polk Ave. where I grew up north of town just to check and see if anything is new.... they are re-doing a old trail out in that area and making it a road now.  I have no idea why.  Went by the old school house.  I love that school house.  When I was a kid the family that owned it was from Detroit and had about 8 kids, I think. Most of my family lived on Polk Ave. at the time, we were like a pack of wild Indians and there was a lot of us kids.  Every time Henery and Beterice came up they would ring the school bell to let us know they were up,  us kids went running from where ever we were because they always brought us candy.  I loved that school house so much I always said when I was little that when I grew up I was going to buy it and make it my Church. ..... 

Anything is Possible

This is my Church some day when God is ready for me to have it.

I used to spend many days as a little girl on that pourch, praying and singing (thank God it is way out in the country and no one couldl hear me singing)  and pretending everyone was going to show up for church and we would go inside.  Strange thing though, I have never been inside of it.

Getting back to yesterday....  I headed back to Saginaw and all the way I was asking God what happened to the the Miracle thing he was suppost to help me do....  no answer..... I said, well the day is not done yet... so we still got a chance....  no answer...

Once I got home and got the laundry done, bed made, and something to eat, I sat down to pray.  Once again I asked God where was the Miracle for the day????  no answer.

I then decided to accept that it was not meant to be that day.....  I got on the computer to check my messages and I had one from Faith....  she had been reading my blogg from the morning.... this is what she wrote....

  Thank You Betty,  You fed my spirit, my mind and my body. I would say your mission was accomplished.....  so I guess sometimes we don't even realize when we create a Miracle for someone. That made my heart and spirit so happy....  Thank you Faith for being YOU.

While on the computer my friend Aleta came on to talk with me.  I was telling her about going to Church in Saginaw and that the Pastor used to be out in St. Louis.  She asked his name and I told her Pastor Van.  She asked a few more questions and then told me her oldest Son,  Tim Erskin used to go to his church in St. Louis and thought the world of Pastor Van and the the Pastor was the reason that Tim went to bible college in Tulsa, OK....  and he still lives in Tulsa and goes to Church at the college....  Tim can now become a Minister himself but don't feel he is ready yet......  wonder what is holding him back.  It is such a small world when you find out you have connections with people through other people...  makes me wonder why God has me in this Church in Sagainaw at this time.....  time will tell.

Love and Light

Friday, November 6, 2009

Reflecting on Life

Reflecting on Life


Good Morning,

Ok, so, I decided today is the day that I am going to try the big things for God.....

I am asking God to let me create a Miracle for someone today.....

All day I am going to be asking for this....  I figure...  what the heck... if I am going to be a servant for God I might as well go big time...  I truly believe we can do anything we ask to do with the help of the Lord.....

Soooooooo......  I will be back on here in the moring to let you know what happened....

I'm sooooo excited...... I just can't hide it.....  :-))))

Love and Light

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Good Karma slide show

Good Karma slide show

Ten Things

Ten Things


Good Morning,

Last night at the Church PEP meeting the decision was made to help a family in need for Thanksgiving and for the Christmas Holidays.....  This is what Church and Gods people are all about.  Through this act of giving I feel we will all be touched by the heart of God.

When I was a kid I lived in Lansing at the time and was attending the Sout Baptist Church.  At Thanksgiving the Church people delivered us a basket of food. My step dad was so upset about it because he was a proud man and did not want help from anyone.  He made them take it back.  At the time I could not understand it all, as I got older I did understand because I got to know my step dad better....  he just felt he was the man of the house and it was his job to provide for his family and was not going to let someone else do his job.  He worked at Oldsmobile at the time and was off work with a back injury but still would not take help.  Since my parents did not attend church with us, one of us kids must have said something to someone at church that made them feel we needed help.  I have to tell you that when a person from the Church came to my house, it was not a good thing because my step dad did not believe in God or the Church and he loved to argue with them.  I am sure they went back and did a lot of praying for him, as they should have.  With all of his wierd ways of thinking... and he had many... he was still a great dad. I thank God for him every day, even now that he has passed to the other side. 

Let us pray for all the families in the world right now that are having a hard time making ends meet and are in need of so many things.....

Love and Light

Wednesday, November 4, 2009


I was cleaning out my trashy office yesterday and came across this letter I had wrote to God when I was still living on Harding, so I thought I would share it with all of you.

My Dearest God,

Thank you for loving me so much that you gave your son to save me from my sins.  Thank your son, Jesus, for loving me so much that he was willing to give his life for my sins.  For these loving acts I will forever be in your debt and service.  I will always accept you as my Lord and savior.  I ask to be of servie to you, to share your word with others, to help who I can.  Lord, I accept that as I do your work and spread your word, some of my family and friends may choose to walk away from me and I trust you to know what is best for all of us.


It has taken me three years from the time I wrote this to finally get into the Church....  guess I am a little slow.  I know I am on a path that I can never turn back on, that God has a plan and I am just following.  In this past year I have had a lot of family memebers removed from my life and I trust it is all part of God's plan for a better tomorrow.

Romas 8:28 says...
And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.

I trust this to be so..

Love And Light

Tuesday, November 3, 2009




I talked with my friend Marsha who is in FL right now.   She was telling me that she will be heading back to MI in a couple weeks.  Marsha's husband, Denny, passed away with cancer last Nov.  She came home in Jan. and spent the summer with her family and me.  She came home then because her mother who was 79 wanted her to come back, so she did, thinking her mom needed her.  Once she was here she realized she could not live with her mom because her mom would not let her do anything to help her. 

Shortly after she was back here she got a phone call from her friend Patty in FL telling her that Patty's husband John had cancer. Now John was the man that helped Marsha with Denny, he would stop by everyday and see if Denny needed anything and would sit with Denny if Marsha needed to go anywhere. Marsha's heart was breaking at the news of John.  She then felt she needed to go back to FL and be with them and help them during Jonh's cancer treatments the way they helped her.  She struggled with it all summer.


Her one brother Richard, who was the one that flew down to FL to drive back with her so she did not have to make the drive alone, had a severe stroke.  He could no longer live by himself or drive and doing alot of what he used to and lost a lot of his memory.  Now her heart was torn between staying and going back for her friend.


Her daughter Denise, who is only 34 was told she had cancer in her kidney.....  she then wanted to stay here for her daughter and be with her during the surgery when they removed her kidney.  They made it through all of that....  

Richard is now living with his mother and Denise is doing good after the surgery....

Thank God Marsha had found a Church to go to while she was home called The New Beginning..... she loves that Church and the people. 

Once she knew everyone was going to be okay here she was ready to head back to FL.  She missed her home, her friends and Denny.  Most of all the life she had there with Denny.  She was excited about going back and being with everyone and helping John and Patty through the tough days ahead.

The first couple of weeks back was good for her, she kept her slef busy with cleaning the house, seeing and helping friends..... then her heart started to get lonely.


Denny was not there any longer and  John and Patty would not let her help them do anything.  Also, she got a phone call from her daughter Denise telling her they found more cancer.....  her heart was torn then...

She finally has made the decision that she needs to move back to MI and be with her family and friends back here... Denny is never going to be in FL again and she needs to move on and start her new path, where ever God leads her. 

Life is all about change, things come and go, people come and go, but God will always be with us....

So I ask that you all keep her in your prayers......

I know this could be anyone of us at any time, so be greateful for the people you have in this life.

Life is not easy for anyone.

Love and Light

Monday, November 2, 2009

Prayer of Jabez

Good Moring Everyone :-)

It sure is a cloudy day..  it might even snow where I am today.. not ready for that one at all.

I now know that when you ask God to come into your life it creates such a stirring in your soul that your mind and body has a hard time staying grounded.  I have been praying the prayer of Jabez for almost 3 years now and I think God is finally enlarging my borders.. what a blessing. I will share more on this at a later time.

And Jabez called on the God of Isreal, saying, oh that thou wouldest bless me indeed, and enlarge my border, and that thou wouldest keep me from evil, that it be not to my sorrow! And God granted him that which he requested.
1 Chronicles 4:10  (ASB)

I have a lot that needs to be done today so I will close for now and write more tomorrow.... 

Love and Light

Sunday, November 1, 2009

Happy All Saints Day

Just found out at church this morning that it is All Saints Day.....  never new that the day after Holloween was All Saints Day.....  learn somthing new everyday!

While I was in church today my cousin was in my heart and mind, so I want to share this with all of you and ask you to say a prayer for her.

She called me the other day with something heavy on her heart and mind.  Her Grandson passed away a couple years back with cancer, he was only 7 years old (if I remember correctly).  He was born into this world with medical problems and needing a liver transplant. He got the new liver while he was still a baby and battled cancer the few presious years he was here. He was born to a mother that had a drug problem and was focused on herself and not him.  She did not take him for lab work when he needed it, she did not come to the hospital to be with him like a mother should and did not spend the time with him when he was at home dieing like she should have....  so, because of all this my cousin has hate in her heart for the mother and I can only try to understand how she must of felt and the deep sadness she felt for her grandson... She went into a deep depression for a while after her grandson went to live with God because she missed he so dearly...  time moved on and she is doing much better.

Now the issue is that the mother to her grandson came into the store she works at the other day and even though she thought she had dealt with all of it......  she found all the old feelings coming back and the feeling of not being able to forgive the mother for not being with her grandson.... 

It must of felt like the devil him self walking through the door that day and bringing all the bad feeling back again. Even though the mothers trying to do better....  my cousin is still holding hate in her heart....  And, on top of all that...  the mother now wants to see her other son that lives with his dad and the dad is going to let her see him.  She can only see him under supervision and she wants that to be her mother and the father of the grandson has agreed to that(which is my cousins son).  My cousin is angry about that also because she thinks someone besides the other grandma should  do the supervision because she also played a part in not being with the grandson when she was needed and lied for the mother....  what a hurtfull situation it must all have been.

My cousin knows in her heart that she needs to forgive but just can't do it yet...  she knows that forgiveness is for her soul but she still can't do it....  I pray that one day soon God will take all this from her and allow her to forgive and even find a place in heart to love the moter of her grandson...  No matter what, God wanted him to be here, if only for a short time and without the mother she would never have known her gandson...  I guess when she can realize that the hate and non forgivness is the devils work.... she will be able to forgive, because the devil loves us to hate other people....  and the devil loves for us to be in the black hole of depression....



Keep this tune in your mind and it will keep the devil at bay because he don't like the light of God..


I love you cuz,